Friday, October 31, 2008

tension head.

Currently feeling: Exhausted
Currently listening to: Disturbia -Rihanna

What's wrong with me?

Why do I feel like this?
I'm going crazy now
It's a thief in the night
To come and grab you
It can creep up inside you
And consume you
A disease of the mind
It can control you
It's too close for comfort

I was down with fever with cough and flu just before Deepavali. Oh, and a terrible persisting headache.
I mentioned to the doctor about my ongoing headaches and she told me it's most probably just tension headache.
So I guess until I learn to relax and not to get all flustered every day at work, I would have to live with this silly aching head of mine.
*straight face*

A few delayed Raya pics coming along.
Syawal ended too soon lah, I didn't get the chance to celebrate Raya with Annisa, Baby and a few other people like I wanted to.

Raya at Aunty Maziey's.

This was after countless shots, under Aunty Maziey's request. Hehe.

So when can we continue eating again ?

He wants to crash at my non existent Putrajaya pad.

I love Raya cookies. Oh wait, I just love cookies.

Uncle Phillip (Khaleed) and Uncle Francis.

My favourite. *smiles*

Told you.

At Batu Pahat after meeting his parents.

Raya at The Best Friend's place.

The Pharmacy Department's Raya celebration.

The PRPs.

Hanif's simple yet sweet wedding.

My darling Stumpy. (My roots need touching up)

OK maybe 'a few' wasn't the appropriate word to use. Haha.

I missed Deepavali at Barath's, which was pretty disappointing as I always look forward to catching up with my Gombak people and indulging in yummylicious mutton curry (and sweet anything). Sobs.

I haven't studied for the exam this coming Monday.
I am so gonna flunk it but as Mr. Sunshine puts it, "Buat apa beli buku mahal mahal if nak ambil exam sekali je ?"

I miss my Sunshine.
We haven't seen each other for a month already !
Lama tak tatap gigi besar nya itu. *sad smile*

I'll be in the Out Patient Department next month.
I just want this year to be over and done with as soon as possible.


Wednesday, October 22, 2008

assistant head.

Currently feeling: Nauseated
Currently listening to: Nothing

On Monday, I was elected as the Assistant Head of the PRPs. Why they need an assistant head ? Beats me.

On Tuesday, my head did not hurt. It felt good. It was on that day too which I found out that the current tenant in the apartment I'm supposed to be moving into next month have decided not to move out. *straight face*

On Wednesday (today), our Pharmacy Department had a Jamuan Aidilfitri. I was responsible for preparing the drinks for the guests. Unfortunately, it was too sweet for their liking. *blushes*
Oh, my head did hurt.


Monday, October 20, 2008

in charge.

Currently feeling: Empty
Currently listening to: Nothing

Yeah, right.


Saturday, October 18, 2008

cranky spanky.

Currently feeling: Stuffed
Currently listening to: Nothing

Daddy, Marc and I were at Aunty Zainon's place for her open house this afternoon.
I stuffed myself with all the cookies I could. I feel a sore throat coming.
Then I had Nasi Lemak (with fried chicken) Marlene brought back from her friend's open house.
I am slowly ballooning back.

Two weeks have passed.
Another 50 weeks to go.
I was a total wreck last week.
Last Thursday I was so exhausted by the time I got back, that I couldn't even bring myself to have dinner (my only usual meal I have) and even open my mouth to talk.
But I could still cry. Haha.
I'm thinking work isn't too bad. *chokes*
Maybe it'll just take some time for me to adapt to this new (stressful) environment.
I get headaches every single day. I am not exaggerating.
I am starting to worry about the amount of Paracetamol I am taking.
Maybe it's the travelling that is wearing me out and making me all stressed out and cranky.
We'll see how next month goes, if this cranky version of me (I feel so sorry for Mr. Sunshine for having to deal with my incessant whining and sobbing) is still around, then I am really not cut out to be working in this line.

Double sigh.

But I pray that HE gives me the strength and patience to at least get through this one year. Aamin.

I need a new white coat.
A new one that is not oversized and doesn't get all crumply 5 seconds after ironing.

Mr. Sunshine is thinking of taking next Sunday off to go back to his hometown.
However shitty I feel nowadays, I am still fortunate and grateful that my family isn't 8 hours away unlike his.
Poor him.
I miss him so badly I just wished I had a private jet to bring me to him every day. OK, OK, every week lah.
We don't get to talk that often on weekdays, because I am too worn out to carry even a short conversation.
Even if we do get to talk, it will be me crying and not saying much. Crazy, I know.
I won't be seeing him until Eizera's wedding and that's like a month away from now.

My convocation would be on the 26th of next month.
Which reminds me, I still haven't paid my convocation fee.
Hajar and I are planning to take the two days prior to that day off, instead of just one day. Boleh ke tak boleh, nak cuti jugak !
I hope we will be allowed to do so.

I have been getting wedding invitation cards in my mailbox every week.
Hanif's, Fira's and Eizera's. I plan to attend all three of their weddings. Ambil berkat. Aamin. Haha.
One of my ex boyfriends (of 1 week) during high school got hitched last week.
What if I told you people it will be my turn in less than a year's time (InsyaAllah, Aamin) ?

I hope we get paid this month.
There is a probability that we won't, but I hope we do.
There's so many things I need (read: need, not want) to do that need cash.
I am so broke it's not even funny.

Boy, I so love Saturdays.

Oh shit, I forgot to dry out my clothes I washed this morning.


with all my heart.

Currently feeling: Okay
Currently listening to: Nothing

I hate work, with all my heart.

I love Saturdays, with all my heart.

I miss my boyfriend, with all my heart.

I miss my friends, with all my heart.


Saturday, October 11, 2008

hello, D.I.S., may i help you ?

Currently feeling: Flabby
Currently listening to: Nothing

Hi all.
As most of you already know, I reported for duty at Jabatan Kesihatan Wilayah Persekutuan last Monday and got to know that I was to be doing my one year training at Hospital Putrajaya.
Even though it wasn't such a big of a surprise, I received that confirmation news with mixed emotions.
Apart from the fact that I knew I had to travel quite a distance from home, the fact that the last time I was there, I didn't quite like the impression the hospital left on me.
Just thinking about it made me all jittery and I almost wanted to cry and beg so that I was placed anywhere else besides there.
Oh sigh.

I wake up at 5 a.m every morning, leave the house at about 5.45 a.m to take the first LRT to Central Market where I would get on the Rapid KL bus to Putrajaya. Some of the Pharmacists suggested that I take the ERL but for the time being, I don't think I can afford to fork out RM 30 everyday.
I take about 3 hours to get back home from work, due to the traffic, so by the time I do get back, all I feel like doing is sleeping and taking the rest of the week off.
Standing for 3 hours in the bus/LRT is not a laughing matter.

I might be moving in to a room in Putrajaya itself but only in November.
Until then, I guess I just have to endure the rough things.

I am in the Drug and Poison Information Service for this first month.
I officially started doing work last Thursday as the pharmacist in charge was on leave until yesterday. So, I had to sit in for her. I was extremely nervous.
I took too long to answer my first enquiry made by a staff nurse that when I got back to her, she had already checked with the medical officer.
I do more than answering enquiries. Basically I was the operator of the Pharmacy Department, transferring calls to whoever and jotting down messages.
There's also lot of paperwork to do.

The other PRPs are OK.
I can say that we all are getting along pretty good so far.
There are 13 of us altogether, including the 3 from UIAM who started in August.
They're also friends of a primary school friend of mine, Marjan, so that's cool.

I would be sitting for my forensics exam on November 3.
I know I am gonna fail.

I should stop worrying too much.

Mr. Sunshine just got a place to stay in Kemaman. And also a fellow PRP (who reported for duty last Thursday).
I am so relieved that he has a friend now.
But he is still not too well.

I don't think I am cut out to be a pharmacist.
I am stupid and slow.
And I am constantly in a state of distress, worrrying about not being able to be competent enough.

I dread going to work.

Darn it.

But I am glad it's the weekend !


*UPDATE: This post was edited on Wednesday, October 22, 9:07 p.m. to avoid any future mishaps. *laughs*


Monday, October 06, 2008

prp in hpj.

Currently feeling: Stuffed
Currently listening to: Nothing

I am a Provisionally Registered Pharmacist in Hospital Putrajaya.

I am so nervous !

I had a real long day and I am extremely exhausted.

I am going to leave home at 5:45 a.m. for work tomorrow.

I am flabby.

I am missing my boyfriend who is down with fever and diarrhea all the way in Kemaman.


Sunday, October 05, 2008

meet the parents.

Currently feeling: Constipated
Currently listening to: Don't Bring Me Down - Sia

It's the 5th day of Syawal and I am at home, feeling sleepy and bloated.
I am recovering from a nasty flu attack I had. My throat is a bit sore and all phlegmy.

I just got back from Batu Pahat yesterday afternoon.
I was there to visit Mr. Sunshine's family.
The whole experience was nerve wrecking not only because I was meeting his parents but also because that was my first time traveling alone for more than two hours.
I took the train to Kluang on Friday morning, which was a one and a half hour drive from where he lives.
He picked me up and I could tell that he was excited (and nervous) to see me. Comel OK.
From his stories of his dad being stern when he was a kid, I was preparing myself for the worse but it turned out his dad was pretty cool.
His mum was such a darling (and such a good host), it's funny that I was at her house and I was not the only one being shy.
I only met one of his sisters. We didn't talk but I thought she was sweet.
His 12 year old brother was good looking in my opinion and I kept teasing Mr. Sunshine with remarks like, "Adik awak handsome, kenapa awak tak eh ?" and "Saya nak tunggu adik awak lah, 12 tahun je kan beza."
*evil laugh*
We left his house early yesterday morning after he got all his stuff in his car as he was leaving for Kuala Terengganu after he drops me off home.

The family and I started our 1st Syawal with visiting arwah Atok's grave (we visited Mummy two days before) in Seremban, then we were at Aunty Zainah's hometown in Nilai for lunch.
We were in Shah Alam in the evening for an early dinner.
I was already having a sore throat (and a runny nose) which I think was due to the fact that I actually finished a whole container of tarts Adam gave me in two nights.

2nd day of Syawal was spent at Aunty Maziey's place, as always.
Daddy didn't come along as he wasn't feeling too good.

It's cool that I am still eligible to collect duit Raya this time around.

I am too lazy to upload photos lah.

As I am typing this, Mr. Sunshine is in Terengganu, currently driving from Kuala Terengganu to Kemaman as he just found out he is placed in Hospital Kemaman.
He is apparently not very happy about it.