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Monday, February 18, 2008

only fools rush in.

Currently feeling: Contemplative
Currently listening to: With You - Chris Brown


I have somehow fallen head over heels with this song.
I like the butterflies in stomach feeling it kinda gives me.

I woke up at around 5 am this morning, because I was feeling bloated and nauseated. Had difficulty of going back to bed.
It's not that I didn't eat, I had KFC yesterday okay.

I don't know how to describe all these emotions and thoughts that are going through me at the moment.

Nicked this off somewhere.
There is a difference between lust and love. Lust is passionate love, and that's the kind of love where you can't think of anything else but them and you feel tingly every time they touch you and you can't keep your hands off each other. Passionate love is important in a relationship, but it tends to dissipate with time. If a relationship/marriage is successful, then with the decline of passionate love there will be an increase in companionate love.
Companionate love is a truer and more lasting love. This is where love might not be as passionate, but it consists of trust, intimacy that is not necessarily sexual, and commitment. That is where the difference of being "in love" and "loving" someone. When someone says "I love you I'm just not in love with you" it means they are no longer sexually attracted to you and they are not willing to put in the commitment and work to pursue companionate love.
I'd have to admit that what we had, or more precisely, what I had for him, was passionate love and passionate love alone. Which sadly melted away and there's just nothing left now.
I am not saying that I am ecstatic with how things have turned out, but I am content with saying that I made the right decision and I am not turning back.
He deserves to be with someone who doesn't question whether she should be with him. With someone who doesn't need a pros and cons list to figure out how she feels about him.

I am still glad and thankful that our paths crossed.
Every relationship is a lesson.

How could I have possibly fallen out of love, when I was never really in it in the first place ?

I have always been told not to let people walk all over me.
I do not think I'm really good in doing that.

You people know how I have been babbling about so and so in my previous posts, right ? It's funny, because I am still talking to her. Still being nice to her. It makes me sound like I'm some sort of a hypocrite, doesn't it ?
Well, it's not that I'm pretending to be nice to her or anything (okay maybe sometimes I am), it's just that when things are okay, they're okay la. But when they're not, they're just not. I have no bad intentions whatsoever towards her and I certainly do not wanna see her in despair or anything.
It's just that when she gets her 'mulut cabul mode' on, I can't help it but to rant here since I don't have the cheek to tell her straight up that I don't appreciate her demoralizing remarks.
I think that's what anyone who happens to be in the same situation as I am should do, confront the other person. The person might not even know they're hurting you because they're doing it out of fun or they were just brought up that way. So if anyone crosses the your line, you should let them know that you will not tolerate all the nonsense. You've gotta be bold enough to stand up for yourself and what you believe in.
And, not let others even attempt to walk all over you.

Hmm.

I have been getting close with someone whom I never thought I would.

Priorities change as you get older.

I have learnt that it's never good to rush into anything. Anything at all.

Hmm.

xoxo

3 comments:

mynn said...

OMG!

i am head-over-sneakers (since i rarely wear heels. teeeheehee~) with the song with you too! :D

..cant help but to imagine me with..err, someone. ;p

judith said...

ermm mel..who r u getting close to btw?.. ehem.. and hello!!.. y havent we met up in agesss???

Melissa said...

mynn: kan kan kannn. *heart smiles*

judith: ehem. i'll let u knw when we meet up k ? hehehe. thats y la ! it's like i haven't been home in agesss also la. sobs !

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