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Monday, January 28, 2008

jigsaw.

Currently feeling: Guilty
Currently listening to: Lifeline - Brooke Fraser


I just want to rant.

My life's like a jigsaw puzzle with so many broken missing pieces.
What's missing ?
I wish I knew.

Nobody really knows me.

As humans, making mistakes are inevitable.
But there are certain circumstances which I feel that you can avoid, that you have the power to control and steer away from doing what you know is wrong.
You know, yet when it's done there's no way of undoing it.

You can tell me nobody's perfect.
I'll tell you I don't want perfection, I just want maturity and integrity.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion.
It's silly to forsake a family/friend just because he/she does not have the same principles as you do.
I believe you should live your life the way you want to, at the same time knowing your boundaries, because you'll never get a second chance at living.

I still have bouts of insecurities every now and then.
Which is absurd, I know.
I know for a fact that I can do better. That worrying about what he thinks/feels is a plain waste of my precious time.
I deserve better, don't I ?

I miss Mummy.
Somebody shoot me, please ?

I just want somebody to hold me, say the words 'I love you', and mean it.
It doesn't have to be from the opposite sex.

Forgive me for being so petty.
There's a saying that when you start to judge someone, you have no time to love that someone.
Then maybe I'd just stick with having no time.

I don't really like myself that much do I ?
There's always something lacking.
Something amiss. Something not good. Not Never good enough.

Not to mention that I haven't been a very good friend.
As a matter of fact I think I suck as a daughter/sister too.
Shoot me again, please ?

Heath Ledger's passing is sad. Real sad.

Funny thing, these feelings have a way of twisting my whole life upside down. I can be floating on cloud nine for a minute and in another, I'd be lying down flat on my face.

This world's full of plasticity and lies.

I'm tired.
This is not PMS.

xoxo

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