abundance in life.

Currently feeling: Flabby
Currently listening to: Nothing

Warning: This post is all over the place. Read with patience. Jika anda tiada patience, sila tutup link ini sekarang, terima kasih.

It's common to see that most of us do not appreciate what we already have and yearn for things that are beyond our needs.
I am sad to admit that I succumb to being like that every now and then.
I complain a lot. Too much, if I may say so. Most of the time about the way I look.
I do go through a lot of epiphanies which most of the time bring me down to tears on the realization of how ungrateful I can sometimes be.
What more do I need apart from the limbs that help me move every day, ears to help me listen to the tunes I love, eyes for me to witness beautiful sunsets and rainbows, a mouth for me to babble and eat (the list goes on) ?
Complaining is something that I should try to put a stop to.
Old (and bad) habits die hard but I am already 24 (gasp !) and I do not want to die being a bitter worry wart who complains and annoys everyone.

I am fortunate to be surrounded by beautiful positive people who remind me that things are not as bad as they seem, and who are always there to lend me a hand when I need one. *smiles*

I am hoping to be less self critical in the future.
I should learn to not beat myself up too much and allocate more time for myself.
I do not want anyone cheering on me to lose weight.
I need people who love me for who I am, regardless of how much I weigh, how many pimples/scars I have or how discoloured my teeth are. I am beautiful in spite of all that. I want to believe that beauty lies deeper than what we see on the surface.
Sometimes I do feel the need to lose weight for reasons that I will not disclose here. Reasons that I am sure have not crossed any of your minds at all.

I shall stop calling myself fat from now on.
You should too.
I still want to be fit, and most importantly healthy. Not thin. Not skinny either.

Just because I do not blog about politics or the happenings around the world (and in our country), it doesn't mean that I am ignorant about what is going on.
I am more comfortable keeping my opinions to myself. So far the only person I have been talking politics about with is Mr. Sunshine, and he knows when I do start, I have a hard time stopping myself. And I end up so agitated. That is another reason why I refuse to say anything in this happy (haha) blog of mine.
I am not in favour of our current country's leader (who has done nothing but brought shame to his party and this country) but I am neither a fan of the person whose personal agenda is to take over the country by any means. It's obvious that most of us want need change, but if change means leaving this country in the hands of a power crazy person who has been maintaining close ties with (insert name of country here), would that bring us any good ?
I don't think so.
Though I have got to hand it to him, he has been very successful in being a manipulative orator.
It's depressing to see how things have become. How do we fight outsiders when we keep on bickering within ourselves ? History has proved that's exactly how this country was successfully colonized.
These people need to open their bloody eyes, stop thinking about themselves (and their cronies) or about power and ego, and think about this country and its people for once.

Oh, darn it.
Sorry.

Fasting has been pretty good so far. Alhamdulillah.

I completed my medical checkup last Wednesday. I am perfectly fit for work. Alhamdulillah. The doctor who checked me was really sweet although she didn't do much except for checking my breasts for lumps and prescribing me with a few drugs/topical solutions for my acne.

THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT.
Have you ever done a Breast Self Examination (BSE) before ? If you haven't, make sure you make it a habit to do so every month from now on.
Cancer is especially close to my heart as I have a high genetic risk of getting cancer (liver, ovarian AND brain). So yeah, if you do not know how to perform the BSE, click here. Or you can just Google it up. *smiles*

I miss Mummy.
I have been refraining myself from writing that in this blog all this while as I didn't want to be portrayed as being weak. Such a weak excuse, I know
But I have been blogging about it a lot on my hush hush blog, where I feel free to be weak and volatile.

Mr. Sunshine was a darling last Wednesday because he was not feeling too well (and he was fasting, of course) but he still brought me to my checkup, to Subang to drop off my lappie and to Shah Alam to settle a few things. Plus we had buka (steamboat buffet !) with his friends that night, which means the both of us were out the whole day ! So kesian him OK. By the time we got back, which was after supper (translated: snooker and early sahur) time, we were both dead for more than 12 hours.
Thank you Sunshine ! *smiles*

The one thing I hate about cooking is when you smell of food (onions, chillies, garlic !) all over and you just have to shower even though you're as lazy as hell to do so.
But I love torturing people with my culinary adventures.
Poor Daddy and Lene. Haha.
I won't cook for anyone else except my family members. It's for your own good, trust me. Nak rasa saya masak, sila masuk meminang. Haha.

You know when you just want to stay at home and not meet anyone ?
I think I need a week of that, please.
I am contemplating on whether I should try turning off my phone for a week.
That would be pretty cool, eh ?

But I want to meet Adam.
And I promised Annisa I'd have buka with her this week after canceling on her last Friday.

So maybe the whole disconnecting period can be pushed to next week ?

I helped the the ex with his lab report this evening.
He's doing pretty good nowadays and I am happy for him.
His mum called last week, still asking when am I going to drop by her place for makan. She was tempting me with all her dishes that are my favourites !

Spicy Chicken McNuggets is back and I sooooooooo want another 9 pieces. 20 piece also can lah !
KFC's Spice Crunch is very yummy too OK !
Thank you Sunshine (again) !

OK lah, this post is starting to make me dizzy.
And Mr. Sunshine wants to talk on the phone with me, so bye !

xoxo